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Fourth Quarter 2005 |
Volume
15, Number 4
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IN THIS ISSUE
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Working
with Others
Are
We Carrying the Message?
“The joy of living is the theme of AA’s Twelfth
Step … Here we experience the kind of giving that asks
no rewards.” So begins the chapter on the Twelfth Step
in AA’s Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions (p.
106).
OA bases its program on the Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous.
The AA Big Book devotes the chapter “Working with Others” to
carrying the message of recovery. It instructs us to carry the
message of our own recoveries. By doing so, we illustrate the
importance of this activity. Carrying the message may help others,
but it is vital to our spiritual well-being.
The chapter contains precise instructions on how to help a newcomer: when to approach
him or her (at the end of a spree), when to leave the person
alone (if the individual doesn’t want
help) and when to involve the family or a professional working
with the newcomer. Through sharing our own stories, we emphasize
the sickness from which we suffer, the fatal nature of our disease
of body and mind, and the strange mental twists that set up the
compulsion. The instructions caution us to stress the spiritual
nature of the solution we have found but to couch it in everyday
terms that will not arouse prejudice.
The AA Big Book emphasizes the importance of working with professionals
in a cooperative and helpful way — never critical. It advises
us not to waste time trying to persuade someone against his or
her will because that may spoil the person’s chance for
recovery later. It encourages us to stress that desire must come
from within and that recovery is not an overnight matter, but
it can come regardless of any life event. We have found a solution
through the AA Twelve Steps, as adapted for Overeaters Anonymous.
We
do not wish to inflict this solution on anyone. No one is obligated
to us. Our only desire is to give help when asked, just as it
was freely given to us. We may wish to give practical help, but
not if the person is simply using the Fellowship for his or her
own needs. Finally, the Big Book tells us not to display an intolerance
of others’ drinking [eating] — the disease
is ours, not theirs.
In my area, we take this chapter “Working
with Others” very
seriously. When people call OA, we try to match them with members
of similar backgrounds. We offer to meet with them, in their
homes or ours, to share our stories of how we came to OA and
what it has done for our lives. This introduces them to the program.
Of course, if they don’t wish to meet with us, we do not
insist, but we do inform them that many newcomers find this practice
helpful. After this meeting, during which we give them an idea
of what to expect in an OA meeting, we offer to take them to
their first meeting and introduce them to members. At the meetings,
they usually hear much about sponsorship; we have plenty of people
ready to sponsor and keen to share what sponsorship has meant
to them.
I am often surprised at how rare this introduction to
newcomers is in OA. Many intergroups have an answering machine
that gives meeting times but leave newcomers to find a meeting
by themselves. They have no knowledge of what to expect, having
spoken not one word with an OA member. Are we willing to believe
the Big Book when it says that carrying the message will bring
about our own recovery? Have we tried it?
At meetings, how often do we hear a request for sponsors to
identify themselves, only to hear them say they are not available
right now? Sponsorship seems to be a big problem throughout OA.
What has happened to us? Have we perhaps forgotten our gratitude
or the people who were there for us when we first came in? Have
we perhaps forgotten that the OA preamble says, in part, “Our
primary purpose is to abstain from compulsive overeating and
to carry this message of recovery to those who still suffer”?
It took me a long time to realize it didn’t say sponsorship
was something to do in my spare time. As it says in the AA Big
Book, “A kindly act once in a while isn’t enough” (p.
97).
Those whose recoveries I admire, those who really do seem to
have that joy of living, are committed to service full-time in
all areas of their lives, committed to trying to live the way
God would have them live every day. I don’t hear them talking
of needing time for themselves, needing balance; they just quietly
ask God to send them where they will be of maximum use to him
and others. These people seem to be free not only of the food
obsession, but also of wanting and of self. Dr. Bob, cofounder
of AA, said better than anyone why we do this:
- Sense of duty.
- It is a pleasure.
- Because in so doing, I am paying my debt
to the man who took the time to pass
it on to me.
- Because every time I do it I take out a little
more insurance for myself against a
possible slip (Alcoholics Anonymous,
4th ed., p. 181).
Sound good? Try it sometime!
— J.H., Lyttelton, New Zealand Top
New
Pamphlet Offers Different Perspectives
OA
Members Come in All Sizes Available from WSO
“You don’t
look like you belong in OA.”
Many OA members have heard these words spoken to them or may have said
them to a fellow member. The misconception that obesity is a requirement
for OA membership may cause discomfort for anorexics, bulimics and OA
members who have little or no weight to lose. Both inside and outside
OA they often have difficulty being taken seriously as compulsive eaters.
The new OA pamphlet OA Members Come in All Sizes: Welcome, Whatever
Your Problem with Food discusses the challenges of recovering from compulsive
eating for members who may not look like they belong in OA.
All Sizes will enlighten both new members and longtimers. The 16 moving
stories of hope and recovery illustrate that while compulsive eaters may
come in many sizes, all share OA’s sole requirement for membership:
the desire to free themselves from their compulsion. All Sizes can foster
greater understanding within groups and within OA as a whole.
To order OA Members Come in All Sizes, contact the World Service
Office (WSO) or order from the online catalog.
Item #110, $1.25 each plus $2.25 shipping for US orders up to $15. For
shipping charges on orders over $15 or outside the US, go to the Literature Catalog page or
call the WSO at 1-505-891-2664.
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Professional Exhibits Fund Guidelines Established
A major focus of OA’s outreach efforts in 2005 is to participate as an exhibitor in large, national professional conferences whose attendees work with people who suffer from compulsive eating. The Board of Trustees has selected four meetings in which to exhibit, but wouldn’t it be wonderful if OA could exhibit in more?
The Board of Trustees, at the request of the region chairs, established a special fund to assist service bodies to exhibit at professional conferences and conventions if the service bodies lack sufficient resources to do so. The board approved the fund at its November 2004 meeting, and OA members, groups and service bodies may now make donations. The board will distribute the funds on an application basis and has developed procedures to evaluate applications.
The BOT will establish an evaluation committee, which will consist of the HIPM trustee co-chair (chairman), the BOT treasurer and the public information trustee co-chairman, with the BOT chairman of the board as ex officio. The committee will do the following:
- Review applications monthly
- Consider national/international and regional exhibits, with national/international exhibits receiving first consideration
- Give preference to service bodies that have not applied for Grant Fund monies or were not awarded Grant Fund monies if they did apply
- Within three days of a meeting, notify applying service bodies of the committee’s decision via email or telephone (if email is not available)
The Professional Exhibits Fund Application is available for download.
If your service body would like to donate to this important effort, please indicate “Professional Exhibits Fund” on the memo line of your check. If the money is sent as part of a regular donation to the World Service Office, please indicate the amount intended to be directed to the Professional Exhibits Fund.
If you know of a professional event that would benefit from an OA exhibit, please consider applying to the Professional Exhibits Fund to help your intergroup, national/language service board or region participate.
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Please Conform Your Bylaws
The World Service Business Conference (WSBC) supports the OA, Inc. Bylaws, Subpart B, by recognizing the need for intergroups, regions and national/language service boards to meet certain registration requirements with the World Service Office (WSO). Requirements for registering with the WSO include submitting bylaws that conform to OA, Inc. Bylaws, Subpart B, or a statement of purpose if bylaws have not yet been adopted. Service bodies must have conforming bylaws or a statement of purpose on file to be eligible to send a delegate to the WSBC.
The statement of purpose is a single-page document that can serve as a temporary substitute until the WSO receives the conforming bylaws. A Sample Statement of Purpose is available for download.
Intergroups with existing nonconforming bylaws or those with a statement of purpose on file with the WSO for more than a year may find it helpful to consult the Sample Intergroup Bylaws.
The region chair and region trustee will work with national/language service boards to create conforming bylaws.
Conforming bylaws or a statement of purpose must be submitted to WSO no later than January 1, 2006, for a service body to be eligible to send a delegate to WSBC. Please consider sending these documents soon to allow time for review by the region trustee. You may send them electronically to lredman@oa.org or mail them to World Service Office, P.O. Box 44020, Rio Rancho, NM 87144 USA. If you have questions, please contact Lee Redman, member services manager, at lredman@oa.org.
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