Third Quarter 2007 Volume 17, Number 3    Page 2 of 2 What's New From WSO Web Links Understanding the Term "Autonomous" Hearing is Believing … OA Members Speak Lifeline Monthly Topics 2008 Overcoming Shame and Stigma New Video Inspiration to Feed Your Recovery! Give e-Lifeline a Try! Give Service … Become a Lifeline Rep! Dateminder What's New From WSO New Name for HIPM Committee Professional Outreach Committee is the new name of the committee formerly known as Hospitals, Institutions, Professionals and Military (HIPM). Delegates at the World Service Business Conference passed the motion to change the name “to broaden the scope of professional outreach and to give this committee a name that clearly captures the spirit of carrying OA’s message to the professional community.” WSO will update literature affected by the name change as inventory is depleted and publications are reordered. New Reduced-Cost Literature Application Form Available The WSO has a new application form available for service bodies requesting reduced-cost literature for professional exhibits. Intergroup Public Information and Professional Outreach Committees may purchase literature through members of the Board of Trustees at a reduced cost when hosting health fairs and professional exhibits. The reduced cost is the higher of either the actual cost of the literature or 50 percent of the retail price. Shipping is extra. The form provides space for listing the event, contact and shipping information; lists the available literature; includes guidelines for making a request; and requires the signature of an OA region trustee. A PDF file of the form and guidelines is available for download. Top Discover interesting and helpful OA Web-site links in Web Links. Ask-It Basket Question — “Even after lots of prayer, how does one know when actions taken are HP's will, not self-will?” Recovery Story — “First Thin Summer” Group Conscience Guidelines — Guidance for groups on conducting business meetings (Links are current when A Step Ahead is published online; however, some pages will be updated during the quarter.) Top Understanding the Term "Autonomous" Tradition Four: Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or OA as a whole. Autonomous — what does it mean? The dictionary states that autonomy is “the quality or state of being self-governing.” What does that mean to me as a member of Overeaters Anonymous? On a personal level, it means, for example, I am free to choose my own conception of God. When Ebby said to Bill W., “Why don’t you choose your own conception of God?” do you think he realized he was creating the foundation of our Fourth Tradition (Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th ed., p. 12)? In the same way that an OA member may develop his or her own concept of a Higher Power, a group may develop its own guidelines, as long as these guidelines do not affect other groups or OA as a whole. An OA group can manage its affairs and even exercise its right to be wrong, provided its decisions do not threaten OA. Our experience has shown that adherence to the principles found in the Steps and Traditions ensures not only the survival of the group but also the survival of our Fellowship as a whole. Does the principle of autonomy imply that my group can do whatever it likes? Yes. However, meetings that ignore the Traditions seem to wither and disappear. Is there a connection? Some examples in which nonobservance of the Traditions could affect OA as a whole include: use of nonapproved literature, such as religious writings; changing the Steps; and accepting funds from outside sources. Our Traditions are not rules; they evolved from the experiences of those before us who learned what did and did not work. Although group autonomy may encourage groups to make their own mistakes, groups, like people in recovery, often learn from those mistakes. Because the Fourth Tradition allows groups their autonomy, an OA group can, for example, set abstinence requirements for members who lead their meetings. Service positions may also have requirements, such as length of abstinence and amount of time in recovery. Other examples may include a request that members turn off cell phones or that children may (or may not) be allowed to attend, provided the children do not disturb the meeting. However, any compulsive overeater, no matter what age, ought to be welcome at our meetings. Tradition Three states, “The only requirement for OA membership is a desire to stop eating compulsively.” Anyone who considers him- or herself to be a compulsive eater can become a member, and that person has the right to share at a meeting. Meeting guidelines may strongly discourage a nonabstinent person from sharing, but it is suggested that groups do not forbid such sharing. Through trial and error, groups find out what works or doesn’t work for the group and its members. Sometimes an issue requires many discussions before the group conscience becomes clear. Autonomy allows a group to decide what works best for its members. — Member of the Board of Trustees Top Hearing Is Believing: OA Members Speak . . . As a member of Overeaters Anonymous, you understand the inspirational power of sharing experience, strength and hope with others. Hearing another person talk about his or her triumphs and struggles along the road to recovery can help you feel you are not alone. Now, a new recording from WSO offers you a collection of such stories to keep at your fingertips. In Hearing Is Believing: OA Members Speak…, OA members describe what they were like before OA, what happened to them after entering the rooms of OA, and what they are like after experiencing the gifts of the program. Their stories of spiritual growth, emotional recovery and dramatic weight loss will inspire newcomers and longtimers alike. This recording can also be a useful resource at meetings, workshops and retreats. “Hearing Is Believing” sounds too good to be true, but it isn’t. It is the sounds of people who have discovered serenity through the Twelve Steps of Overeaters Anonymous. Cassette: item #685  $5   CD: item #686  $6  plus shipping Shipping: $3 for orders up to $18. Orders $18.01 to $100, 17% of total. Above $100, 12% of order. Call the WSO for shipping charges outside the US. Top Lifeline Monthly Topics 2008 Lifeline is created from OA members' letters. Monthly topics are suggestions. You may write about any subject important to your recovery from compulsive overeating. Send your letters to Lifeline, PO Box 44020, Rio Rancho, NM 87174-4020 or email: info@oa.org. FEATURES: Stepping Out, Service with a Smile, Living Traditions and Taking the Spiritual Path continue. Newcomers Corner: Speaking from the Trenches gives newcomers a place to share their OA experiences and concerns. OA Around the World presents a brief history of OA in a country or area, significant accomplishments and sometimes short pieces from local members. Please send your history today! Generally Speaking (general OA topics) and How OA Changed My Life continue. Main Attraction focuses on public information and attraction. DEPARTMENTS: Ask-It Basket, Datebook, For Discussion and Web Links continue. Share It runs only if sufficient material is available. OTHER MATERIALS: Lifeline accepts letters, artwork and photos (no faces, please) for publication. Credit lines and rights to submitted work apply equally to articles, artwork and photos. Submitted materials are not returned. Lifeline may edit articles and crop photos. Lifeline promotes “unity with diversity” regarding the race, nationality, gender, age, physical challenges and sexuality of its writers. Please submit articles at least three and a half months prior to the first day of the month of publication. Deadlines appear in parentheses next to topics. Indicate the topic and month for which the article is intended. Typed letters by mail, fax or email are preferred. Letters must contain the author's name and address, even if the author wishes to remain anonymous in print. Thank you. JANUARY How OA Changed My Life (9/15/07) What is your before- and after-OA story? FEBRUARY Sexuality and Body Image and Majority of One: One Disease and Lifeline (10/15/07) Write to one of these topics. (1) Have you struggled with sexuality or body-image issues? How have you overcome them? (2) Have you ever felt “different” in OA? What experiences have you had with diversity and unity in OA? How can minorities in OA find strength in OA unity? What made you realize it was not the differences but the disease and recovery that were important? (3) Share why Lifeline is important to your program. MARCH/APRIL A Bicycle Built for Recovery: Abstinent Members, Service Bodies, Strong Meetings, Steps, Traditions and Concepts (11/15/07) Write to one of these topics. (1) How do the spokes in the wheel of the OA bicycle help OA move forward (see page 16)? (2) How has a single Step, Tradition or Service Concept influenced your recovery? (3) What made you realize abstinence comes first? Does abstinence rub off? (4) How has service above the group level changed you? How does it benefit OA? (5) How did your group create a strong meeting? Do you believe abstinent members make strong meetings? How could your meeting be stronger? MAY Sharing Our Experience: Who Knows You’re in OA? and If I Could Tell a Still-Suffering Compulsive Eater Just One Thing… (1/15/08) Who knows you’re in OA? Why don’t you share this information? In what ways could you share your program that you’re not doing now? How do you carry the message without fear or shame? Or, answer this question in 300 words or less: “If I could tell a still-suffering compulsive eater just one thing, it would be… ” JUNE Physical Recovery: Its Place in My Program and Meeting the Membership Requirement: A Desire to Stop Eating Compulsively (2/15/08) What place does physical recovery have in your program and life? When and how did you realize going to meetings and giving service were not enough — that a desire to stop eating compulsively was the key? How did Tradition Three help you recover from relapse? JULY Generally Speaking (3/15/08) Write on the OA topic of your choice. AUGUST Longtimers Share: Then, Now and Not Yet (4/15/08) What were you like, how did you recover, and why do you stay? How have you dealt with life changes? How has OA changed over the years? How do you picture the Fellowship in 10 years? SEPTEMBER/OCTOBER Step Principles: What Are They and How Do We Practice Them? (5/15/08) Why are the Step Principles important to your program? Or write about one Step Principle that has made a difference in your life. Principles: honesty, hope, faith, courage, integrity, willingness, humility, self-discipline, love, perseverance, spiritual awareness, service. NOVEMBER Finding Self-Esteem and Accepting Reality: Being a Compulsive Eater and Holiday Preparations (7/15/08) What was your self-image when you joined OA? How did you find self-esteem and change your self-image? How has this affected your life? Does self-esteem mean something different to you now than before OA? Is acceptance part of self-esteem? What made you finally accept that you were a compulsive eater? How do you prepare for abstinent holidays? DECEMBER Abstinence and Personality Conflicts: How We Grow From Them and Holiday Strategies (8/15/08) What is the most important thing you did to achieve abstinence and then maintain it? How has your abstinence changed with life changes, such as aging, illness, family life, career, vacations or other challenges? How do abstinence, holidays and relationships influence one another? How do you deal with conflict in family relationships? How have you used the Steps or Traditions to cope with difficult people? How do you maintain abstinence over the holidays? How do you cope with the holidays in other ways? Top Overcoming Shame and Stigma Many of us came to OA with great suffering because of the shame we felt about our compulsive eating. People had told us we were greedy or bad and should have more self-control and discipline. If only we could have! Only after we came to OA did we discover we were suffering from a disease and the disease was an addiction to food — an allergy and an obsession. The relief we felt was enormous, but for some reason we often felt unwilling or unable to share our solution with others. We discovered, however, that only when we told others the nature of our disease did our lives start to change. Some members found they began to share their stories more freely after doing their Fourth and Fifth Steps, while others discovered this when making amends as part of the Ninth Step. Still more found they had to tell people straightaway because they realized their reluctance was connected more with wanting to keep their eating options open! Whatever the reasons, we have found that one of the best ways to overcome the stigma and shame is, when appropriate, to simply tell people about our disease: what things we did when eating and what we have done to recover. While some of us may occasionally experience a hostile response, most of us find that our true friends are delighted we have found a solution to our problems and a way of living that brings peace, dignity and usefulness to our lives. Those close to us know we have struggled in many aspects of life, and they are only too pleased to see us happy at last. They, too, may have struggled to understand some of our behaviors, particularly people who may have seen us lie, cheat, and put food and our own needs before the needs of our families. They have good reason to appreciate an improvement in our behavior! Our preamble and Tradition Five tell us that our primary purpose is to carry the message of recovery to compulsive eaters. As it says in the Big Book, “Practical experience shows that nothing will so much insure immunity from drinking [eating] as intensive work with other alcoholics [compulsive eaters]” (Alcoholics Anonymous, 4th ed., p. 89). If I don’t tell those around me I’m a member of Overeaters Anonymous, then do I truly live by these principles? Do I miss opportunities to plant the seed that might save another’s life? Can I really rid myself of the shame, stigma and self-consciousness of the disease without giving away what has been so freely given to me? If I don’t take this step, might I lose my own recovery? Might the whole program wither and die? Do I experience that “joy of living” I am told is the theme of our Twelfth Step? If we are in doubt about whether any connection exists between sharing our recovery freely and ridding ourselves of the stigma and shame of being a compulsive eater, we might take a moment to ask ourselves the following questions: When I was in the food, how did I feel about my eating and other behaviors? What was my reaction when I first heard people in an OA meeting talk openly about what they had done with the food? How many people in my life today know I’m in OA? Have I talked with them about what I did with the food, what OA is and what it does? What reactions did I get from my family, extended family, friends, coworkers and people in other settings when I told them what I did with the food, what OA is and what it does? Have there been occasions when I deliberately did not tell people about being in OA? Did I not tell because of what they might think of me? Did I not tell because then I might not have been able to eat certain foods? Does not telling cause stress in me or my relationships? If I tell people I am in OA, what is the worst thing that can happen? Is there anything I need to do differently? What can I do differently? Am I willing to take the chance? If not, am I willing to pay the price? — Jill H., Lyttelton, New Zealand Top Be one of the first to discover a new OA video, “American Medical Review Profiles Overeaters Anonymous,” also known as “AMR.” The 12-minute DVD opens with introductory remarks by a clinical psychologist and the former managing director of the World Service Office. It continues with OA members illuminating the purpose of OA. Men and women of diverse backgrounds discuss the difference between suffering from compulsive eating and having a “weight problem.” Their heartfelt stories of recovery convey the experience, strength and hope they found in the OA Fellowship and offer inspiring messages of the emotional and physical benefits that come from living the Twelve Steps of Overeaters Anonymous. The AMR video is ideal for use in intergroup functions and as an informational tool at health fairs. And on those days when you need to hear and see inspiration from OA members but have no meeting available or no one answering your phone call, you can drop in your AMR DVD and feel a wave of recovery inspiration in your own living room. AMR DVD Item #652 $6 AMR DVD-PAL Item #650 $24 AMR VHS Item #651 $6 AMR VHS-PAL Item #653 $24 Shipping: $3 for orders up to $18. Orders $18.01 to $100, 17% of total. Above $100, 12% of order. Call the WSO for shipping charges outside the US. Top Give e-Lifeline a Try! Did you know that Lifeline has an online version called e-Lifeline with the same articles and graphics as the print version? For $13 a year, you can access e-Lifeline every month and also have access to the 12 previous issues in the e-Lifeline archives. If you live outside the US, you will save postage every month and know it will be delivered on time, every time. Give e-Lifeline a try. (See sample issue.) You might just love it! Top Did you know that some OA members don’t know that Lifeline exists? Hard to believe, but true. You can make a difference. Become a Lifeline rep and let your group members know the joys of Lifeline in print and e-Lifeline on the Web. To sign up and receive your free rep kit, contact WSO, call the WSO at 1-505-891-2264 or write to Lifeline, P.O. Box 44020, Rio Rancho, NM 87174-4020 USA. Top DATEMINDER IDEA DAY International Day Experiencing Abstinence November 18 EACH GROUP HAS BUT ONE PRIMARY PURPOSE — TO CARRY ITS MESSAGE TO THE COMPULSIVE OVEREATER WHO STILL SUFFERS. Top Previous page   Attention Intergroups: Please inform the WSO whenever you have meeting changes to your directory. A Publication of: Overeaters Anonymous, Inc. P.O. Box 44020 Rio Rancho, NM 87174-4020 USA Phone: 1-505-891-2664 Fax: 1-505-891-4320 E-mail: info@oa.org OA Homepage Registered OA service bodies may reprint articles crediting A Step Ahead and Overeaters Anonymous. © 2007 Overeaters Anonymous®, Inc. All rights reserved.